Amplified Silence

Things are going the way they should; the way they are; the way I want them to. Yet there’s this feeling of discontentment. The reason for this is not obscure to me; though I might be too aghast to blurt it, even when I’m by myself, alone; lonely, that is what I feel today and felt yesterday and the day before that and... (As a matter of fact I’ve been around a lot of people lately so I don’t feel deserted because I have no one to hang out with, it’s something else! Besides, staying alone has never been a worriment. So, the option of staying aloof is ruled out as the cause of my fretfulness.)

I miss a couple of people today.

Though I thought naming people in my blog would be forbidden yet I have to let Akshay know that I really wish he was here; he’s the one guy (the only person in this world) I can talk to about anything and everything and not feel stupid after that for telling him how I felt. He seems to be listening ( =p ) and understanding whatever I tell him. Yes, you might call me selfish and desirous for wanting him to be here only so that I feel better; but what the hell, it’s just a wish!

Second day: just on time (again) - got soaked on the way (it was pouring like nobody's business) - did my homework in office - deleted the file i was working on for so long (who would say i slept well last night?!) - got fever - am starving (it's lunch time)
Hope rest of the day goes smooth as well =p

First day: just on time for office - LOT of work - heavy lunch - only 3 hours of sleep - slight hangover - long day - slept before mid night!

Haywire High Spirits

I will not say I was commendable but I was not pathetic as well. I was a blameless host, but my sister seems to think otherwise (she definitely does not put herself in somebody else’s shoe).

Some friends are annoyed with me, when I’ve been trying my level best to handle things with the right balance (and trust me seeing the situation this is an ace bargain).

Parents ensure that they find one reason or the other for being the ground of scolding their child (agreed they know more than us, but they must understand that kids will learn only by mistakes and not by lectures).

I get tired (physically) too often and too early these days. Showing sister around cannot be the deduction because straying was never a botheration to me. Yes, shopping might be it! To hell with the Great Singapore Sale!

Am exhausted, of trying to keep the mind and the relationships calm. Hope everything is being handled when I wake up tomorrow morning. Am literally exhausted! Goodnight…

Skylark

Something's missing in life! No, it's not love (if that was your first guess). There's plenty of that as of now from everywhere.
Perhaps I HAVE become an adult. As much as i admire being matured and sofisticated, i want to be a child again and want my juvenile years back. It's not that life's stereotyped and there's no fun at present, yet there's something missing. Something that cannot be expressed in words but is tasted by all at one point in time or the other, and it's my time now. But, I will not sit back and feel my mind get restless. I shall go back into time; squeeze the past; grab the childhoodness; and dare to mingle it with adult in me! The child will never die, for she is what we all need (dodo adults conveniently ignore that fact).
Ah, i already feel umm..youthful!
Nah...it's not time for me to grow old now. It's fun and frolic time!

History "Hatched"

Today’s day would be distinguished as the day when Shifali, for the first time, cooked! The food was delicious (I’m sure parents would second the motion). More than proud I was excited. It was enjoyable standing near the gas, everything lined up to be poured into the cooker; vegetables chopped, masalas labeled. So basically, the tough part was already done by others I just had to do the painless. But it’s not that it did not require patience, skill or tolerance (it was pathetically hot in the kitchen!). I’ve “fired” the cook bhaiya, told him “u don’t need to come anymore, this house has found a new and a better cook” =p. (he must be having a ball tonight).

Gym was also entertaining. Few acquaintances here in Jammu, all of them dropped by, in that one hour when I usually don’t want to talk to anyone and work out, but it was pleasant for a change.

I wore the most beastly, nauseating and nasty nail polish today. I guess it was just a reaction to my fantasy of having long nails come true. I was so overly blissfully happy that it hardly mattered when I was applying it. Later, when people commented, either on nails or the color, I felt more stupid than girly!

Mirror Mirror on the Wall....

I wasn’t nervous, neither was I cocksure, I was just..umm...angry. I did not want to take part; I was forced to. I did not want to embarrass myself (guess I didn’t after all). I did not want to walk like a…girl. But all's well that ends well! Am happy now with 3000 bucks of well deserved prize (that’s what everyone said at least) and a trophy in my hands and an ugly looking crown (a hair band rolled with red cloth and “decorated” with golden stars) on my head. I wasn’t really on top of the world but yes, it was..umm..fun! (minus the part where I had to repeatedly recite the words “thank you SO much uncle/aunty” and smile one end to the other to reciprocate theirs; man my jaw was exhausted more than my feet, at least I could remove my heels once I was off the ramp)

P.S.: I thought my answer was horrifying, especially when I heard my voice in an eco. No, no don’t get it wrong. It wasn’t that bad either. (Trust me I did not bribe the judges!!)

P.P.S.: There was a tragedy when my chance of performing came but I shall be shush about it for now. Alright! I guess I DID embarrass myself a bit =p