Clean table, dirty room, lot of work, consistent effort to finish it bit by bit, loud music; seems like I am back in old JC days except that instead a cup of coffee, what lies next to me is a bottle of water; except that the door is not open (cluster mates get disturbed); except that she’s not sitting on the table next to mine to sing along with me (occasionally telling me how bad my voice suck), to talk about guys, to bitch about the world, to share mutual cravings for food, to wake me up in five minutes, and most importantly to tell me that I don’t look fat from side, back and front profiles (After June 2005, it was all lies!)
I’ve been brought up with boys, had more boy-friends in school than girl-friends (I hated most of those girls). I am just so uncomfortable around girls. Maybe it’s the universal fact that girls are bitchy; you never know what she’s going to say about you to her friends once you turn your back. Maybe it’s the fear that many of them would dislike me (I am sorry but I just can’t put up the fake ‘Oh! I am so happy to see/talk/spend time with you’ for more than 5 mins’).Though I do try sometimes due to criticism from my male friends - ‘you don’t have any girl friends’, and in hope that I would at least like a few of them and they would like me too. And I do enjoy the company of a handful of them, but the thought of meeting them again and hanging out makes me go zsa zsa zsu and so I tend not to make any such plans.
